Patchy Thoughts on Travels & Getting Old

Now that I am thinking, I feel like I am a lousy writer. I like reading what I write merely for the memories the stuff create. I need to express more of my feelings in my writing too. I think that's an important element in a story that's gripping.

So I am taking a friend's advice, which is to write right away, so that the feelings will show -so to speak.

Sitting by gate A9 at the Toronto Pearsol Int'l airport now. My flight to Chicago is scheduled to leave in two hours. What's different about this trip is that this is the first time ever that I had to take a cab to get to the airport. My father in-law has been ill, unable to perform certain activities including driving.

Leaving 11:45 PM EST, I wanted to leave the house by 8:30 AM. Taxi driver came early so I was out the door by 8:15. Took less than 20 mins this morning to get to YYZ. Couldn't believe how easy traffic was!

So, here I am. Only 9:30 AM and already sitting beautifully at the boarding gate.

Nice thing about YYZ is, they have the US customs right at the airport. No, am not kidding.. They have the sign 'Welcome to the USA' right inside the Toronto airport. You'll fill out the blue custom form, go to the custom booth, get asked a couple of questions, then get your passport stamped. Pretty sweet, isn't it? You don't have to deal with long lines and everything at your first point of entry in the US.

Traveling from Eastern Canada to the West Coast is the whole day kind of travel, unless you take a direct flight.. which I believe only one airline, Air Canada that is, does offer that these days. I myself fly via Chicago, with a 5 hr lay-over. That said, I will be arriving home around 8:15 PM PST tonight.. And 11:15 PM EST/Toronto time that is, close to the next day! Phew!!

I do like traveling. I really do. I don't think this passion will ever vanish, ever. There is always an excitement about checking out new places. Sadly, though, the excitement perhaps has gradually gotten somehow normalized in the past year or so.

This year hubby and I are going to Thailand. It's going to be my first time and I am pretty excited about it. Who doesn't love massages, Thai food, Asian hospitality, and adventures on night markets? Not to mention staying at great/luxurious accommodations at reasonable costs? I do!

I used to think it must have been nice to not have worries about money and to be able to take any vacations you want. To be living that kind of life now -well, not that I can take off anytime for a vacation since I have a job, but I do have the means to cover world travel expenses - I indeed consider myself very lucky. Very lucky that I am almost afraid that I have started taking these things for granted. Consciously, I know I don't. But unconsciously, perhaps I do. I can't deny my feelings and that is for sure.

The thing I have lost passion so far is.. playing/learning the piano. I find that one sad, cause I used to wake up to playing it just a couple of years ago. One of the things I have gradually lost an excitement for would be.. exploring Europe. I started taking into accounts things that never mattered. Things like.. "I think this country is too far.".. Or.."I'd rather go to the other place because it's only one flight away", or like "Perhaps I won't go there cuz that means I won't drink bubble tea for 2 weeks,".. Or "This country's staple food isn't rice and most of the areas in their big cities seem slummy.. So maybe not..". You know.. Stupid things that never used to matter (to me).

Or is this a part of getting old? You have certain preferences on things, and the degree of willingness to deviate from them is just getting smaller. An easy example would be from my husband. I used to wonder why he would flat out say no to staying at certain hotels because of their inferior standard. I used to think.. Why spending more money if you are just going to crash there? His answer would be that he's been there, done that, when he was young. Now that he's old he wants convenience, quality, and value over other things. Now I am able to perfectly see his point.

Another thought would be.. Is it laziness? What's the matter with taking connecting flights while on vacation.., right? Get that lazy ass move, will you? XD

I just don't know.

I know one thing, though. It is not depression. I  was almost pretty convinced that I was depressed at some point. But then I realized.. there are other things that I haven't lost enjoyment for, like good food for example.

Or.. is it home sickness? I am giving myself random options of where I may want to travel next year: Indonesia, A couple of countries in Western Europe (thinking about Poland, Austria & Czech Republic), Japan, or resort-style vacation in one of the Caribbean countries -which I used to think as pretty lazy/stupid/lacking of sense of adventures. And guess what? I am already leaning towards going to Indonesia.

Gonna wrap up here as I feel like napping. Hopefully I will be able to sleep during one of my flights later. Flight to ORD is leaving in 1.5 hr..