We All Do Judge, But...
This note is inspired by a very recent occurrence in my life. Phew.. How do I start? So.. A long story short, must say that I never met a person so micro-managing before until a couple of days ago. Okay, this is a person I encountered during some training (won't say where and what it's for since I'd like to keep this confidential). She is almost a decade younger than me. Funny thing was that I thought she's older than she actually was. And now that I think about it, I may have thought so simply because of the way she acted. So yea.. Not necessarily did she look old or have wrinkly skin or anything, but just from how bossy she was to a trainee so to speak.
Truth is.. I don't mind people being bossy to certain extent. But when one criticizes/comments/rectifies (according to her very own standards) on every single thing that the other person does, that's simply a no-brainer definition of annoying.
A few of the many examples I have: I was pouring some milk shake from the carton, tapping the carton to get the last milk drops just for a couple of seconds. She said: "It's not gold, you don't need to do it like that". Other things were: "Do it like this,.. do it like that". Another one: "You're funny. Just stack it, don't have to be perfect." -when all I did was stacking row of cups while making sure they're even. She also eyed on my every move, and commented how I should have done almost every single thing I did. Being married, I can say that I wouldn't stand being with a person of that kind in a marriage XD
I am so grateful to have had the opportunity to attend the school I went to for nursing. It's a prominent university; Its nursing programs are known for being some of the bests in the nation. The teaching staff (our instructors and professors) were very nurturing with our learning. Despite the rigor of the program, they promote creativity and acknowledge individuality.
As much as individuality is being valued in the Western society, it is not always perceived as a positive value, right? But what I mean by acknowledging individuality is the uniqueness of every of of us in my cohort was appreciated. Our teachers comprehended the idea that there are multitudes of ways of learning and that different people adopt different ways of learning. We are not robots so trying to program us to do things in certain ways will probably not work too well.
K, back to the micro-managing case. I was so taken aback by the attitude of this person took. First of all, I had over a year experience working in the work setting I was involved in, which means I've developed certain ways of doing things. Second of all, I certainly wasn't in training for elementary stuff -such as.. how to stack medicine cups, how to pour liquid to cups, how to crush pills, how to talk on the phone, bla bla bla -some of the things she instructed to do actually made me want to laugh.. a bit silly to be persnickety about, and most of the times they're just a bunch of non-substantial particulars. Oh Lord, help meeeh :D
I think we have to keep learner's age in mind. Adult learners shouldn't be treated the same way as kids. Teaching elementary-level stuff in a condescending way, to me, is almost like insulting one's intelligence.
One thing though, you can always be as informative as you can get.. meaning that you may try to mold a newbie they way you want him/her to do things using a tactful/nice way when delivering your messages.
I've been quite pleased, however, with how the training went overall! My other trainers were great and I was able to learn a lot from them. I learnt a lot from Ms. Bossy too. For the entire time being with Ms. Bossy, I just went ahead with whatever she told me to do. I needed to complete my training without any conflicts and thank God I was pretty good at getting any potential frictions away from us.
As you see.. I judge people. In fact, I judge people all the time. But I learn when to say it and when not to. I also try my best to check with my assumptions first, that way I can assess my own judgments. This is one of the things that nursing school taught me. They kept saying to check our assumptions. We often times forgot where others are coming from with what they do. And I can say the same for the bossy trainer, like.. perhaps that's the only way she knows on how to do things instead of me saying.. wow I can see how she's not very open to new ideas!
Anyhow, that was my pet peeve of the week. I treasure the experience, but wouldn't want to do it again if given the choice lol. It definitely helps me figure out myself better: I know one thing and let me say it loud and clear.. I don't like being excessively bossed around -this is also one of the reasons why I hated (training) for hospital nursing. I don't like being treated like a robot, and I believe there are a thousand ways to Rome.
'Nuff said.
Any comments will be appreciated!
Truth is.. I don't mind people being bossy to certain extent. But when one criticizes/comments/rectifies (according to her very own standards) on every single thing that the other person does, that's simply a no-brainer definition of annoying.
A few of the many examples I have: I was pouring some milk shake from the carton, tapping the carton to get the last milk drops just for a couple of seconds. She said: "It's not gold, you don't need to do it like that". Other things were: "Do it like this,.. do it like that". Another one: "You're funny. Just stack it, don't have to be perfect." -when all I did was stacking row of cups while making sure they're even. She also eyed on my every move, and commented how I should have done almost every single thing I did. Being married, I can say that I wouldn't stand being with a person of that kind in a marriage XD
I am so grateful to have had the opportunity to attend the school I went to for nursing. It's a prominent university; Its nursing programs are known for being some of the bests in the nation. The teaching staff (our instructors and professors) were very nurturing with our learning. Despite the rigor of the program, they promote creativity and acknowledge individuality.
As much as individuality is being valued in the Western society, it is not always perceived as a positive value, right? But what I mean by acknowledging individuality is the uniqueness of every of of us in my cohort was appreciated. Our teachers comprehended the idea that there are multitudes of ways of learning and that different people adopt different ways of learning. We are not robots so trying to program us to do things in certain ways will probably not work too well.
K, back to the micro-managing case. I was so taken aback by the attitude of this person took. First of all, I had over a year experience working in the work setting I was involved in, which means I've developed certain ways of doing things. Second of all, I certainly wasn't in training for elementary stuff -such as.. how to stack medicine cups, how to pour liquid to cups, how to crush pills, how to talk on the phone, bla bla bla -some of the things she instructed to do actually made me want to laugh.. a bit silly to be persnickety about, and most of the times they're just a bunch of non-substantial particulars. Oh Lord, help meeeh :D
I think we have to keep learner's age in mind. Adult learners shouldn't be treated the same way as kids. Teaching elementary-level stuff in a condescending way, to me, is almost like insulting one's intelligence.
One thing though, you can always be as informative as you can get.. meaning that you may try to mold a newbie they way you want him/her to do things using a tactful/nice way when delivering your messages.
I've been quite pleased, however, with how the training went overall! My other trainers were great and I was able to learn a lot from them. I learnt a lot from Ms. Bossy too. For the entire time being with Ms. Bossy, I just went ahead with whatever she told me to do. I needed to complete my training without any conflicts and thank God I was pretty good at getting any potential frictions away from us.
As you see.. I judge people. In fact, I judge people all the time. But I learn when to say it and when not to. I also try my best to check with my assumptions first, that way I can assess my own judgments. This is one of the things that nursing school taught me. They kept saying to check our assumptions. We often times forgot where others are coming from with what they do. And I can say the same for the bossy trainer, like.. perhaps that's the only way she knows on how to do things instead of me saying.. wow I can see how she's not very open to new ideas!
Anyhow, that was my pet peeve of the week. I treasure the experience, but wouldn't want to do it again if given the choice lol. It definitely helps me figure out myself better: I know one thing and let me say it loud and clear.. I don't like being excessively bossed around -this is also one of the reasons why I hated (training) for hospital nursing. I don't like being treated like a robot, and I believe there are a thousand ways to Rome.
'Nuff said.
Any comments will be appreciated!
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